I'm FAMOUS!

Happy Thursday, LilyOnTheLam.Com Readers!

If you read my March 29, 2014 post, you'll know that I was "recognized" at the 200 Food Truck Rally.  The first food truck we went to, I gave my name when we placed our order.  The food truck owner said "My wife wants to know if you are @SouthTampaLily on Twitter."  I had never been Twitter-recognized in public before!  What was this warm gushy feeling coming over me?  OH YES ... IT IS WORLDWIDE ADORATION!  

Does one food truck owner associating the name "Lily" with the dazzlingly brilliant @SouthTampaLily Twitter account equate to global love, adoration, fame and respect?  

Um yes.  

It's really really hard being famous.  You know when Gwyneth Paltrow said in an interview with E! that being an actress/mom on a movie set was harder than moms who work 9 to 5 and then go home?  Well, this is way harder.  Basically going to a food truck rally and being recognized by the masses is a much more strenuous experience than the daily work of coal miners, migrant farm workers and any nannies who work briefly for Mariah Carey.  I'm pretty sure President Obama is considering giving me a medal.

Unless you're a Bravo TV fan, following my Twitter account is arduous and painful work.  (Some Bravo TV fans would say it's arduous and painful to them too!)  I live tweet some of the Bravo TV shows … and other times I tweet about scintillating topics like: "what my cat vomited up today."  Now frankly this may still be more interesting than CNN trying to make up things to talk about for Malaysia Airlines Flight 370 when there is no news.

My remaining tweets are daily promotions of either my blog or events I am "appearing at" in the Tampa Bay area.  I knew a woman who fancied herself a singer.  She would hit all the karaoke nights at local bars.  She would announce "Monday, I will be performing at ____ …  Tuesday, I will be performing at ____… "  I bit my tongue (HARD) so that I would not say "YOU'RE NOT PERFORMING - YOU'RE SINGING OUT OF TUNE TO A STEVIE NICKS SONG DURING A BAR KARAOKE NIGHT!"

But I am a nice person (insert eye roll here), so I didn't say any of that.  Instead I drew blood from my tongue!  Ever since then, I like to say "I will be appearing at …" or "I will be performing at …" or even "I will be starring in …" as a tribute to this person's mad delusions.  Imitation is the highest form of flattery.

Because my Tweets are so inane and boring, I forget that anyone in the world can access them.  (Why would you want to?)  Every now and again I find my Tweets quoted in online articles - usually about Bravo TV shows, of course.  But even more fun for me is when they are shown on the social editions of Bravo TV shows.  I have had maybe 10 Tweets flashed up on the screen during various episodes of Bravo TV shows like: Real Housewives of New Jersey, Real Housewives of Atlanta, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and Vanderpump Rules.  I love when my Twitter followers take the time to Tweet me a screenshot of my Tweet on air if I missed a social edition episode.  (Thank you all, so much!!) 

Another fun "Tweet Repeat" is when my Bravo TV show tweets are shown on The Gina Show online.  Gina Cutillo hosts a show dissecting and recapping reality TV shows.  I don't watch regularly (sorry Gina!), but I know my Tweets have been "featured" on at least a couple episodes.  But who knows - maybe I'm so popular that there is a special "Lily corner" on every episode.  Maybe a shrine with a big picture of me and roses everywhere.    

On the April 2nd show, @RyMills713 on Twitter was Gina's guest co-host.  If you fast-forward to the 27:30 mark, you'll see/hear Gina & Ryan discussing a certain @SouthTampaLily's comments about this past week's "Real Housewives of Atlanta" where one of the Housewives celebrated being cast in a musical by skipping the musical's first practice to party.  Thank you Ryan for the shout out! 

Now I am not surprised this particular Tweet made The Gina Show - as it was retweeted by Bravo TV Tweeters many many times.  And as I type this I am having a flashback to the scene where Madonna starred on the TV show "Will and Grace" oh so many moons ago when she said "This is everyone's favorite shirt on me."  So for me "This is everyone's favorite quote of mine!"  I Tweeted that this moment on The Gina Show was basically my version of the Kim Kardashian sex tape, but my butt is much smaller. 

This Will and Grace/Madonna clip doesn't have the aforementioned quote, but it's still funny …

  

Of course internet fame like this only encourages me to spend my time Tweeting more boring Bravo TV bits.  I could be finding the cure for cancer, but no - I need to tell the world what I thought about Part 3 of "Real Housewives of Beverly Hills" reunion.  (It sucked!)    

One of the reality TV blogs asked if I would like to write for them.  Sigh … every one wants a piece of THE LILY.  It's so hard … Gwyneth and I are the only ones who truly understand how hard it is.  Sigh.  Double sigh.  Famous person sigh.

I am like this salted caramel ice cream sandwich from the now closed
Au Petit Chavignol in Vancouver, BC.
I am salty, sweet and oh so good looking in a paper wrapper.

Always up for a new experience, I sent the blog a Bravo TV "Million Dollar Listing New York" episode recap.  I have no clue if it was good or bad.  Most likely too snarky, but who knows?  We shall see if it meets the reality TV blog interest test.  (SPOILER ALERT:  It's being published today.  They like me!  They really really like me!  Either that or they needed some new content and would have taken a top ten list of my cats' favorite things or a grocery list as well.  I'll edit this post with the link when it officially "drops."  I am pretty sure the Mayor is giving me a key to the city with this one.  It has dropped!  Read my episode recap here.)    

I'm not really sure where I go from here … This is pretty much the pinnacle of fame for anyone.  People spend a lifetime trying to get to where I am, celebrity-wise.  It must be really hard for all those little people.  Brad Pitt called me the other day asking for advice on how he could be as famous as me.  I screamed: "HOW DID YOU GET THIS NUMBER?", hung up the phone and fired my Brad Pitt-loving assistant Jean-Claude.  

Did I mention how hard it is living in the public eye, universally adored by all?  I'm the Suri Cruise of Bravo TV reality show live Tweeters.  

And that is saying a mouthful.