Tuesday, May 21, 2013

In Times of Sorrow, Take Action

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Hello LilyOnTheLam.com Readers:

Is it just me or does it seem like we have been getting hit with one tragedy after another?  The movie theater shooting in Aurora, Colorado; the school shooting in Newtown, Connecticut; the devastation of Hurricane Sandy, the Boston Marathon bombings, the garment factory building collapse in Bangalore,  the Texas building explosion and now the tornado devastation in Oklahoma.  

I watched the news yesterday, praying that the ever-increasing death toll was a reporting error and luckily today, it is now being reported that the death toll was half of what it was earlier reported.  However even one life taken is too many and many of the dead were young school children - lives taken too soon.  How does one rebuild when so much has been taken away?  

I felt a heaviness in my throat and chest as I watched images of the Oklahoma barren wasteland of scrap metal and ruin that once was happy communities.  The now infamous picture of mud and blood covered parents running with their children captured the horror and helplessness.  

Sitting in my living room in Florida, I felt such sorrow and helplessness watching people who have had their home and lives completely thrown into chaos and destruction in such a short span of time.

When the Boston Marathon bombings occurred, I felt very fortunate because a small group of people I knew who ran the marathon were all safe and sound.  But I felt so ... stuck, I think is the best way to describe it.  I wanted to help in some way, but I didn't know how and I just felt sad, angry and helpless.  

While there are many victims' organizations for the Boston Marathon, I felt like I needed to make a difference closer to home.  At my liberal arts university, one of the prevailing mottoes was "Think globally, act locally."  I decided that I needed to channel my sadness into an act of positivity locally.  Sadness wasn't going to help the situation.  I needed to take action.

At the same time news of the Boston Marathon bombings seemed to be everywhere, I stumbled upon a much smaller news story that to me was just as sad.  Five years ago, I remembered hearing a story that literally made me cry.  An 18 year old Asian-American woman was returning books to the local library when she was attacked, raped, beaten and left for dead.  She suffered traumatic brain injury and was placed in a medically-induced coma.  When she was brought out of the coma, she could no longer speak, walk or control her muscles.  Her mother quit her job to stay home to care for her full-time.  The attacker is now serving a 65 year sentence, but the young woman is also serving her own type of prison sentence.  She was 18 years old at the time - she had her whole life ahead of her and this man stole it from her.  

The family of the young woman who was attacked (I hate to use the word "victim," as she is a survivor and deserves respect not pity) chose to keep her name out of the press.  However five years later after the attack, with rising medical and care costs; the family has recently created a website www.JoinQueena.com to give progress updates on the young woman named Queena, give hope and inspiration and receive donations to help defray the daily expenses necessary for her care.  (Read more about it here and here.)  She also has a Join Queena Facebook page with updates.

In the midst of all the overwhelming sadness of the Boston Marathon bombings, I decided that while there was nothing I could do to reverse time and stop the bombings from happening - I could help this young local woman, who like the Boston Marathon bombing victims was an innocent who had her entire life changed in one horrific episode.  I made a contribution to JoinQueena.com.  I am not a millionaire (I wish I had won the recent $590 million Powerball!), but I do believe that it is always better to give something rather than nothing.  

Making a donation didn't change what happened to Queena or what happened to the Boston Marathon bombings, but I felt like "OK, having sadness and feelings of overwhelming anxiety are not productive.  Helping is productive."  

Action is what it takes to rebuild and move forward.  Feeling sad doesn't change anything.  I also signed up to volunteer at several local organizations.  Actions do not have to be just donations.  

Yesterday when the tornado in Oklahoma hit, I once again felt completely overwhelmed, sad and anxious as I watched the horrific news footage of the devastation.  I looked at my email and there was a thank you note from Queena's family on behalf of Queena.  It said "Thank you for your support and for making a difference in my life!"  Talk about perfect timing.  It was a reminder to me that while it is OK to be sad about tragedies in the world; I needed to pair my emotions with action.  Volunteering, donations - anything I could do to help.  

If you are looking for ways to help, please check the following articles and links:

Links for How To Help Those Hit By the Oklahoma Tornado

Oklahoma Tornado Victims

Humane Society - Oklahoma

American Red Cross

JoinQueena.com

At the bottom of Queena's thank you email are the words "I AM GRATEFUL."  In the face of so much tragedy in the world, I find that taking time to consider all that I am grateful for is the way I can keep from feeling consumed by despair and sadness for all the victims.

If you're feeling overwhelmed, you may wish to channel your energy into positive actions - whether donating money, donating your time, mentoring others ... find the way that you can help whether locally or on scene of the tragedy.  There is so much in life to be grateful for and yet entire lives turned upside down and changed forever in a minute.  I try to help others when I can, because sadly I could easily be the victim of a tragedy and would hope others could see it in their hearts to help me.  

I wish all of my readers positivity and strength amidst this seemingly endless array of tragedies.  I hope you will take time or give of your pocketbook to help a worthy cause.  Life is short, let's make the most of it by helping others and ultimately helping ourselves.  Thank you for reading!


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